Like the Lord almighty, 7x7 giveth and 7x7 taketh away. Take, for example, topknots, which, we're here to tell you, are over. 7x7 was the first to the male bunparty back in May 2014, championing the librarian-chic 'do for dudes as ultra-sexy. Which it was. Hollywood A-listers like Jared Leto, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Jake Gyllenhaal all helped give this look steam. But the time is now to make it stop. Stop doing that thing to your hair. 

From Valencia to Divisadero and anywhere there's an eatery with an absurdly long line, San Francisco dudes can still be seen wearing this now-ridiculous hair trend. Like harem pants and hardcore ombré hair—two lightning-fast fads that have since been mercifully euthanized—topknots went from must-have to must-shield-eyes in but a few shorts months. Today, sadly, these poofs of hair look downright silly. What used to give you that aura of cool, careless aloofness now makes you look like Pepper from American Horror Story.

We bring this to your attention not to be derisive (well, not just to be derisive), but to help. Because, if you're not careful, you could find yourself on the receiving end of some vigilante justice. Behold the horor happening to South African hipsters sporting the man bun (pst, the video is tongue-in-cheek):

Instead, here are a couple of better alternatives for lads geared toward style. Wear your hair down and tousled à la local artist Zio Ziegler.

Or, like Sightglass Coffee's Peter Smith's look, push it back into a casual pompadour.